La Cucaracha: Turn Your Roach Into A Rocketship

by McGoo

Before our publisher Brad bought the roached-out relic you see here, this once-proud ’95 CR125 dwelled in Pro Circuit’s dyno and testing stable. Its previous owner understood the complexities of maintaining a thoroughbred, and remained committed to that cause until his last day of ownership. Unfortunately, abuse and neglect started to show on Brad’s bike even before his third and final ride three years ago. Since then, Brad’s bike has collected dust and ridicule in my overstuffed garage. Its filter has been cleaned only twice, once by me and once by my friend Bart, who took the bike for a joyride last year. The bike has never been washed. Countless shifty characters have loaned Brad’s bike to their girlfriends’ nephews for trail rides in the hills behind my Elsinore tract home. Over the years, a handful of losers have helped themselves to the nuts and bolts on Brad’s bike whenever their machines laid down on them. Of course, Brad doesn’t know about any of this pillaging, or about my plan to fix up his jalopy and sell it to the first kook in a pair of LBZs. That is, until now.

Whether you plan to sell your roach or just clean it up for another season of videotaping no-footers at the local sand wash, these tips will help you get the most bang for your buck. I planned from the get-go to sell Brad’s bike because I was tired of storing it. To increase its curb appeal, I leveraged every industry hook-up to the hilt. You won’t be so lucky. Still, all receipts for parts, labor and materials totalled under $1,200¿much less than even the down payment on a new ride. This included the cost of my ultimate deal-closer: a big 420 on the number plate. What hessian motocross wannabe could resist a bike this clean with a number that sweet? I bet Garth we wouldn’t even have to put Brad’s cockroach in the Cycle Trader. To find out if I was right, read on…

THE MONEY PIT
Mechanically speaking, Brad’s bike was sound. Aesthetically, however, La Cucaracha was a goner. Here’s a list of the parts and services required to bring our eyesore back to respectability:

PART PRICE
EXHAUST:
FMF Gold Series Fatty Pipe $189.99
FMF Powercore II Shorty Silencer $99.99

CONTROLS:
TAG Metals X5 7/8″ Aluminum Handlebars $79.95
909 Clutch Lever Assembly $89.95
909 Replacement Brake Lever $19.95
909 Velocity Grips $13.95

DRIVETRAIN:
Renthal Ultralight Sprocket, front $25.95
Renthal Ultralight Sprocket, rear $64.95

ACERBIS PLASTIC:
Radiator Shrouds $41.99
Number Plate $21.99
Side Panels $47.99
Fork Guards $24.99
Fender, front $16.99
Fender, rear $21.99

GRAPHICS:
One Industries CR125 kit (tank, radiator shrouds, swingarm) $59.99
One Industries Pre-Cut Number Backgrounds $18.95
One Industries Numeral three-pack (3 total) $20.85
One Industries Vinyl-Sided Seat Cover $74.95

FORK SERVICE:
Fork Disassembly, Rebuild and Oil Service $105.00
Fork Seals and Pro Circuit Fork Oil $75.00

MISCELLANEOUS:
Throttle Cable $24.95
Airbox Mud Flap $29.95
Makita Ball-Burnishing Drill Head $19.95
Scrubbing Bubbles with Bleach (4 24-oz. Bottles) $10.76

Total $1,190.21

WHERE TO BUY

The following companies donated life support to this project. If you want to turn your clapped-out trail turd into a race-worthy rocket ship, this is where to start:

FMF RACING
(310) 631-4363
fmfracing.com

RENTHAL
(877) RENTHAL
renthal.com

ONE INDUSTRIES
(858) 874-5760
oneindustries.com

TAG METALS
(858) 874-5760

PRO CIRCUIT
(909) 738-8050
procircuit.com